I am often drawn into the emotional roller coaster of wedding planning that my clients go through, both women and men. It has nothing to do with gender. It has a lot to do with expectations. Not necessarily those the couples have: from the Venue, entertainment, ceremony, photography or me. It’s the expectations of their immediate family and friends. Very often, those expectations are not even verbalized but more of an impression.

This is the moment that you can easily pass or get pulled in. In my opinion, there are many ways to avoid this and I have listed a few that I find most efficient:

1. First, it’s not a shame to ask for help. Speak with your best friend, sister, brother, mum or a person you know abroad who can help with advice. Just by recognizing the problem, you are already getting problems solved.
2. Make a list of tasks to be done. Delegate tasks. Include your mum, siblings and friends. As much as they complain, trust me, they will appreciate being involved. If you have hired a wedding planner, share the contact, he will help them help you.
3. Make your wedding weekend more realistic. You don’t have to book a spa for all your friends at that super expensive resort, you don’t have to visit an island to have a beautiful welcome reception, and you don’t have to spend thousands of EUR on gifts. It’s just an angle from where you are looking at everything and it doesn’t look close to what you had imagined to be. Share cost or just simply it more relaxed and budget wise.
4. Stick to your budget. I know, it’s you wedding day and ‘once in a lifetime’ thing. Nice, but also a perfect trap for emotional spending. You can stretch the budget a bit for something really fabulous but try to work it till the very end. You will feel at ease with getting married abroad. Always ask for another offer until it just fits.
5. Do make it a vacation. That’s why you had decided on a destination wedding in the first place. Go to the beach, explore, go out and party, have fun! Vibe around you will just transcend to all guests and vendors involved and you will feel the love and appreciation.
6. Don’t chase your Pinterest idea of a wedding. Those photos are edited and used to sell products, not real. This doesn’t mean your flowers won’t be just as beautiful, probably much more beautiful, just seen by your eyes, not a camera. Those photos will follow a few weeks after the wedding.
7. Weddings are about sharing love and commitment. It’s also about sharing your bonds with those who you love the most: your family and friends. Try not to get lost in things that are not important and focus on love around you. That’s what really matters.
8. And last, enjoy. Dance with the man/woman of your life! Celebrate your love! It’s your day and everybody is there to share it with you! Smile, hug and thank everybody for coming. That’s the favour they will remember always. And it’s for free.

photo: nina photo